Meeting Death and Living to Talk About It

Sebastian Junger is the New York Times bestselling author of In My Time of Dying, Tribe, War, Freedom, A Death in Belmont, Fire, and The Perfect Storm. He also codirected the Academy Award-nominated documentary Restrepo and is the recipient of a Peabody Award and the National Magazine Award for Reporting.

Drawing on his experience reporting from war zones and surviving a sudden medical crisis, Junger reflects on mortality, human connection, and the power of storytelling to make death feel less distant and unknowable.

“Today, many adults have never seen someone die and are likely to have no underlying religious belief. Both of those things make death fearsome and alien. Powerful death narratives can help break that down, just as powerful war narratives can help bridge the military-civilian divide.”

EW: As someone who has reported from the front lines of war and faced your own near-death experience, how did those moments change your understanding of mortality and the meaning of life?

Sebastian Junger: The dangers of war always seemed specific to the place. I thought that if I did not want to be in danger, I simply should not go to war zones.

Then, as a healthy and athletic man, I nearly died from a freak medical event.

That made it clear that all of us are alive by the merest chance and that our lives are brief miracles that may have no enduring meaning at all.

EW: How has that experience influenced the way you think and talk about the end of life?

Sebastian: Many people who are dying may not realize they are dying.

Perhaps that is better.

EW: How can storytelling, through journalism or personal narrative, help make death a more accepted and less feared part of life?

Sebastian: In earlier eras, people often died at home, including children, so death was familiar to most people.

It was also experienced within a religious context.

Today, many adults have never seen someone die and may have no underlying religious belief. Both of those things make death feel fearsome and alien.

Powerful narratives about death can help break down that distance, just as powerful war narratives can help bridge the divide between military and civilian life.

EW: In your exploration of resilience and community, what have you learned about the role of connection during periods of profound personal or collective loss?

Sebastian: Community and human connection are our most effective buffers against fear, pain, and grief.

Drugs and alcohol may provide temporary relief, but they can also cause devastating harm.

People who are not part of a close-knit human group face a much higher risk of depression, anxiety, suicide, and addiction.

Affluent Western society does not offer any obvious solution to that problem.

EW: Which societal belief about death and dying most needs to be challenged?

Sebastian: The belief that death is unnatural, repulsive, or embarrassing.

It is no more unnatural than any other human process, including birth.

It is simply what mammals do.

EW: You researched the science surrounding encounters with the dead during near-death experiences, including how they might be understood through neuroscience and physics. Without claiming certainty, do you believe those connections are real?

Sebastian: I am a journalist, so I do not offer personal opinions.

There are legitimate and rational reasons to believe that, like beetles, raccoons, gazelles, and sardines, we are biological beings whose individuality ends completely at death.

There are also legitimate and rational reasons to believe that we have no clear understanding of the basic phenomena of existence, including consciousness.

The divide between life and death may be a false one that conceals how all things in the universe are connected in ways that exceed human understanding.